Certain people, after the conflict, refuse to acknowledge, discuss or examine their role in it. They aim their best to not think of it, forget it, throw it away, and “off of themselves” and move on. They also don't want to dig inside it: “it’s too much, it’s too late, what’s the point? Onwards!”
And so, this very strategy assures the inevitability of the next rupture. The future is guaranteed to repeat until the lesson is learned. And in order to pass, I have no choice but to direct my precise attention and deeper awareness to the cause of my suffering. Oh, the stifled pain in myself and my loved ones! Now, I understand that as long as I refuse to examine, dissect and evaluate my very own role in the turmoil, I ensure its consistency and perpetuity.
I keep reaping the Karma I sow.
And until my last breath, I have an opportunity to right it.
If the strategy is generally that of avoiding the hurt and the sorrow, the very avoidance promotes gradual submergence of energy into the unconscious. Whatever I refuse to look at takes a stronger hold on me. This energy now drives me, it's in command.
As we know, the energy cannot be created or destroyed in an isolated system. I am a single unit of consciousness within a grander consciousness - my environment, culture and society. The energy has to flow somehow.
Flowing unconsciously, it is grosser, younger, habitual, reactive, defensive - resonating on lower frequencies.
As the energy becomes conscious, the flow's elevated in frequency promoting inner and outer harmonisation.
Our rapport and healthy coexistence thrive on consciousness of the dynamic. The more aware I am of what is really happening between my partner and myself, the more I can right the hurt we keep causing each other in relating in our old outdated patterns.